Monk Brewers Pray for Quiet Life

For more than 160 years the Trappist monks at Saint Sixtus monastery in Flanders have been producing a rich, dark-brown, beer renowned for its exceptional flavour and strength. But an unexpected misfortune has befallen this reclusive community of 26 Cistercians: their beer has been named the best in the world.

Before I begin, “Umm… beer…” -Homer

There’s no problem here. Brew the same amount you always did and increase your prices until demand levels off. Piece of cake. [via Thunderstruck]

Is Hell Exothermic?

Got this email forwarded from a friend and thought you might find it interesting. This despite the fact that its logic is flawed, its theology felonious and its tone quite juvenile, nevertheless the email was good for a laugh (or two).

Is Hell Exothermic?

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so “profound” that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.

Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell and therefore the number of souls in Hell increases exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, “it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct…leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting “Oh my God.”

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY “A”.

Are You Going to Heaven or Hell?

I’m fairly certain that God doesn’t determine someone’s eternal destination the way the folks over at Constantine do. But it’s interesting anyway; even though their bloody quiz doesn’t give us credit for not doing something bad. Where did you end up?

God Speaks

Remember these billboards? There are over 10,000 billboards in 200 towns. Now they’ve also got a God Speaks Web site.

Possible Solution for the Church-State Debate

Noah Feldman recently published a considerate and thorough analysis of the issues involved with the idea of “a separation between church and state.” I thought it was so well-done, I made a copy to reference just in case the NYT goes out of business. (I can dream, can’t I?)

A Church-State Solution is quite long but I encourage anyone even slightly interested the topic to read it. There are a multitude of ways in which these concepts affect today’s legislators, judges and ultimately each one of us. The quick hit (spoiler) is this:

Despite the gravity of the problem, I believe there is an answer. Put simply, it is this: offer greater latitude for religious speech and symbols in public debate, but also impose a stricter ban on state financing of religious institutions and activities. This approach, the mirror image of O’Connor’s compromise, is drawn from the framers’ vision and the historical experience of separating church and state in America.

As in every long-standing difference of opinion, both sides are guilty of their share of wrong-doing. It’s not about fixing past mistakes but about moving together in the direction that is best for our country.

ACLU Attacks Boy Scouts, Again

Ever since the Boy Scouts have stood up for their right to abide by their own charter, the ACLU has attacked them at every turn. Here’s the latest:

In a case brought by the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), U.S. District Judge Blanche Manning has ruled that the Pentagon can no longer sponsor a Boy Scout jamboree held every four years. This decision is merely part of a long ongoing battle the ACLU has waged against not only the Boy Scouts, but also any other American institutions that have a connection with religion.

Judge Manning, your religious intolerance won’t fool people for long. With these continued attacks against people and organizations that even mention the concept of faith, more and more Americans will want to Stop the ACLU.

Freedom of Religion, Not in Vermont

It seems the state government in Vermont is overstepping its bounds because they are not allowing Shawn Byrne to register this vanity plate. I wonder is ALAHRLZ would get the hook as well? Whatever clerk or manager that denied this plate should be ashamed.

Hitler’s Second Chance

Hitler desired to rule the world.

Like Alexander and others before and since, some men strive for complete and utter control. Could what’s happening today, in the form of the European Union be what Hitler had hoped to build? Without wars, without force, the EU has made subservient each country’s nationalistic traditions and identity.

Alan Franklin, a Brit who’s seen first-hand the effect of the EU in his own country has written EU: Final World Empire. Mr. Franklin believes the EU is the empire described in Revelation and will soon be led by the anti-Christ. It’s frightening stuff, but we should move forward with our eyes open and not dismiss something as non-plausible until we’ve had a chance to check it out.

The EU is forcing its will in many ways. They’ve actually arrested fruit merchant Steve Thoburn in 2001 for (get this) selling his fruit by the pound rather than the EU authorized metric system. Drivers license? No more country emblem, now the EU star logo is mandated. Same with Visas and Passports.

Nationalism is a thing of the past in Europe. Defy the European Union and their new breed of socialism will come and have a little talk with you. It makes me appreciate America even more.

Update: Found this story on the Week Standard titled My E.U. Vacation, “What I learned reading the European constitution on a French beach in the Caribbean.”

Church Debating Jesus’ Divinity

The United Church of Christ is divided over whether they should have a basic tenant of their faith that Jesus was divine. I find it hard to believe that something so basic to all of Protestant thinking would be met with disbelief. What do these people do with all the verses that describe him as a person doing things unlike anyone else who’s ever lived?

From the story:

“The whole point of this is that many of these people have a very fuzzy idea of faith in God,” said the Rev. Albert W. Kovacs of the Hungarian Reformed Church. “We have significant numbers of clergy who don’t believe in God.”

I’m amazed. How can this even be a subject of debate? It would be like a dolphin who decides he no longer wants to live in the water.

Unfortunately, this isn’t the only denomination that’s watering down God’s Word, picking and choosing the parts that make them feel good. There are warnings against doing just such a thing.

What Is Your World View?

These quizzes can ranges from horrible to slightly better than horrible, in terms of how well they actually describe an individual. But they’re fun, people like them so they’ll continue to make more.

Today’s quiz from the prolific QuizFarm.com is What Is Your World View? More than some of their other popular quizzes :

• What’s Your High School Stereotype?
• What Type of Lesbian Are You?
• Which Disney Character is your Alter Ego?
• What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In?

This one targets are more important issue. After all, we’re all going to die at some point, well, maybe not the immortal Dick Clark (188,000 Google results), but the rest of us. So in a very real way, we’re betting our after-life on one of these world views. Let’s see my results.

You scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creative’s are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Existentialist		75%
Cultural Creative		75%
Romanticist		50%
Idealist		50%
Postmodernist		44%
Fundamentalist		38%
Modernist		6%
Materialist		6%

What is Your World View? (corrected…again)
created with QuizFarm.com

I think the gentleman (or gentle woman) who created this quiz meant well, but perhaps they don’t understand the world view classifications? An existentialist is largely a person who believes that human existence as unexplainable. That’s certainly not me, even though I do have questions. Who knows what a “Cultural Creative” believes? Perhaps it’s an amalgamation of various view points.

From the list given I’d rate myself closest to the much maligned Fundamentalist. Here’s the the definition of fundamentalism:

A usually religious movement or point of view characterized by a return to fundamental principles

Quirky Quiz Questions
I think the biggest problem with this quiz is it’s difficult to understand what several of the questions were about. Take this one, for instance.

26 Religious dogma and scientific empiricism are both steps in the wrong direction.

This requires the quiz taker to understand two somewhat tricky concepts. How many of us can give an accurate definition of dogma? Does the author truly understand it? What is Scientific Empiricism? I’m not exactly sure. Sounds like a leading question to me.

17 If given free range, humans will find their own place in the universe.

What exactly is “their own place”? Do we have one now or don’t we? Since we haven’t setup colonies on Mars are we failing? Does free range mean no supernatural interaction or govermental interaction or what? Pretty vague.

19 Everything is rational if given the right amount of effort.

And I have absolutely no idea what question #19 is looking for. Sounds like my college Philosophy 101 professor. Eek. [via Presurfer]

Worshipping Tolerance

In the realm of faith, are all beliefs equal? In a very real sense, much of America believes that it doesn’t matter what you believe, just that you believe in something.

If you investigate the claims of each faith, then delve deeper into the mysteries of the supernatural and choose a belief system as your own, doesn’t that mean you find it to be the best one? It would be crazy to bet your soul on Plan A and then come back around and say Plan B, C and D are equally valid, wouldn’t it?

But for many today, if you are a Christian, some will label you “intolerant” if you say that you believe in your faith. The most amazing part is that unlike many religions, one of Christianity’s most basic tennants is that all are welcome, anyone can come and be warmly accepted despite any previous sin. Strange.

Anti-Christian Organization Cries Foul

The Americans United For Separation of Church and State is at it again, this time targeting the Air Force Academy. They claim the Academy is favoring Christians. In reality, there’s just more persons of the Christian faith than other faiths attending the Academy.

It’s really just way for the AU to continue their anti-Christian efforts. Sad really that an entire organization is based on opposing something else.

Dojo Info 5/3/05

1. Why the world’s most famous atheist now believes in God.
   It’s nice that someone so well-known is willing to let people know when he believes he’s made a mistake. But it’s still sad that to him God is a power being that in his view cares little about Antony Flew.
2. How the Pope Turned Me Into An Evangelical
   A most beloved Pope it seems to an outsider.
3. kottke is blown away by the Sony Librie
   Tough to get too worked up until I could handle one myself, but the concept is certainly appealing. But he’s right, without open standards someone else will dominate.
4. Picking Designer Homes Off the Rack
   Almost always in the contemporary theme, I just love them.
5. Pat Robertson’s Right
   What is the greater threat to America, al Qaeda or liberal judges? Robertson says the judges and many agree.

Thoughts on Franken

While heading to lunch, eating and then traveling back I had the opportunity to listen to the Al Franken show on Air America. I never thought Franken was funny back on SNL and with some of the extreme things he’s been saying lately, I can’t say I’m a fan, but I wanted to give him a fair shake and listen to an hour before formulatting an opinion.

After listening, here are some thoughts:

• I can understand why liberals hate Limbaugh. He comes off quite hateful. It’s likely the same for the conservatives who hate Franken. Most of what both say is devisive. There’s almost no attempt at seeking the truth of any given topic, but rather poking or prodding at the position or person who holds the opposite opinion. It really raises my opinion of Dennis Prager who appears to be consistently sincere.
• Franken isn’t funny. At least, not to me. I gave him the benefit of the doubt but didn’t get even a single chuckle. To be fair, his topics during the hour were a bit on the heavy side.
• Franken showed genuine love when talking about his father who recently passed away. It reminded me that he’s human and I appreciated that.
• The whole idea of separation of church and state, in my opinion, is being dishonestly promoted. When someone goes back and reads the original documents and not some recent (most likely liberal) interpretation of them, it’s very clear that the Founding Fathers did not want to remove all aspects of religion from our nation’s government. A very good book on the topic is David Barton’s—America’s Godly Heritage. At only $3.95 it’s a wonderful value as well.

Pope v265 Installed

Pope version 265, code named Benedict XVI, was formally installed today outside St. Peter’s Basilica. I didn’t know that’s how they did it. Hopefully, everything went well, no nasty calls to tech support or anything. I wonder how many discs it took?

All I’m saying is it’s important to have a guy in charge who’ll honestly interpret the Bible rather than twist it towards their own agenda. You know, kinda like this Bishop who says that Jesus was a homosexual.